The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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