Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize