Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
