If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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