operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
