i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
