It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
