hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
