Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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