He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
