I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
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I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
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Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize