David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
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