when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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