wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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