"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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