So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
