No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
