yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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