so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize