you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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