I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Randomize
