Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
