You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Randomize
