...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"