Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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