Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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