Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
