The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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