She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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