We won't sleep together?
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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