obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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