On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
