Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Randomize
