Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
