I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
