Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
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