The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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