Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
