Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize