I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
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So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
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I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.