Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
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