would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
