butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
