As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
