i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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