So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize