The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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