New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize