So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
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