ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize